K!







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Giacometti : Art Gallery of New South Wales

Giacometti : Art Gallery of New South Wales



Wonderful Moments.







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Check this out:

http://www.mineomizuno.com/new08/galleries/g7_wiremesh/index.html


Wonderful pieces!

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http://www.zhanghuan.com/ShowWork.asp?id=17&iParentID=1

Performances and photos of a NY based artist, Zhang Huan


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Next would be by artist Anish Kapoor!

http://www.anishkapoor.com/works/

magnificent scale! Fantastic execution


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Their works are quite confronting! Take a Deep Breath.........




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John: Be careful Melinda.
Mel : ??
John: Your fingers. The rate you're going, your skin is gonna get thinner. It'll be really sore.
Mel : Ok!

".......Apparently, his words fall on deaf ears"

And, guess what..... YES, it hurt badly :(
SERVE ME RIGHT!

Suria- *maybe i didnt get his name right*, but anyway, he's our T.A for litho modules. Pretty funny and out going guy. Helpful indeed. Went for a coffee break with dash and i jokingly said to her

Mel : We've got a new T.A. He's an eye candy.
Dash: Be careful
Mel : Well, eye candy wont kill
Dash: Nahz, im saying we have got lots of gays in our school of art esp. Some who looks like one- may not be one. Those who doesnt look like one are often one.
Mel : Hahahahhaha.....! I get where you're coming from. But..... he's got a ear piercing on his left ear. Apparently, he's straight! Even if he isn't, it doesn't bother me anyway.


Been coping myself in school, busy with projects. I need a LONG break after assessment. Alvin is leaving for Melbourne this come friday. He wouldnt be around for the weekends. Aww........... I need to head to bed soon!

Night, All!


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As time goes by, everything just seems to get blurry. The lack of effort to text and call, to communicate only faster the process of taking one another out of our lives. Every hour, every min and every sec passed each day without much interaction just seem easier and easier to move away from what first seem to be precious and loving. Thats how it has become and if i were to be asked " Why did it turn out this way?" My answer would be " I've hoped as well as waited for too long." Someone once told me, we can only hope but we cant request nor asked for things.



When one hopes for too long, the strength to carry on will just diminish as time goes by. But whatever the case is, there are other things out there that deserve so much more than anything. so guys, below is a quote from Oscar Wilde:

“What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise”





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The walls are built, the distance is felt, and then whats left? - I question.


love, lust, trust, respect, desire etc etc....



















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WOMAN as an OBJECT

Porn has a distinctly male viewpoint. It's about what looks good, to men, which is understandable when you consider it's mainly men who are watching it and they only have a window of 20 minutes to watch it in (which isn't always conducive to female orgasms). But then, is the reason only men watch it aided by the fact that women are rarely anything but objects? For women, the turn on comes from other things, other places. You rarely get a good view unless there's a mirror involved, which let's face it, only really happens in hotel rooms, and our idea of a good view may be a little different.


It then questions:
If you're not the SUBJECT, aren't you the OBJECT then?

Men/ Mind/ Culture

Women/ Body/ Nature


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Saatchi's masterstroke
This could be the biggest art news story of the year - Charles Saatchi, the man who has been at the helm of modern British art for over two decades and single-handedly wrangled some of the best talents in the nation, has just announced he is handing the reigns over to us, the British public.

Housed in the Duke of York HQ off the Kings Road, the 70,000ft Saatchi Gallery and its 200 plus works of art will be known as the Museum of Contemporary Art London, once Saatchi retires. Among the works (estimated to be worth £25m) are pieces from GQ's Feng Shui editor Tracey Emin, the Chapman Brothers, Grayson Perry and artwork from Saatchi's recent exhibits of Indian and Chinese art. The move promises to leave the nation unburdened from costs, with the museum continuing to foot the bill. While the Tate Modern, Saatchi's main rival, is busy cleaning up its public image after demonstrators dumped oil outside the South Bank gallery in protest over its BP affiliations, the creation of MOCA London might mark a new age of British art.

I'll Make Love To You

Close your eyes, make a wish
And blow out the candlelight
For tonight is just your night
We're gona celebrate, all thru the night
Pour the wine, light the fire
Girl your wish is my command
I submit to your demands
I'll do anything, girl you need only ask

I'll make love to you
Like you want me to
And I'll hold you tight
Baby all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to

Girl relax, let's go slow
I ain't got nowhere to go
I'm just gonna concentrate on you
Girl are you ready, it's gonna be a long night
Throw your clothes on the floor
I'm gonna take my clothes off too
I made plans to be with you
Girl whatever you ask me, you know, I'll do

Baby tonight is your night
And I will do you right
Just make a wish on your night
Anything that you ask
I will give you the love of your life

I'll make love to you
Like you want me to
And I'll hold you tight
Baby all through the night
I'll make love to you
When you want me to
And I will not let go
'Till you tell me to


It was beautiful. You seem so right, but i could be wrong. But i intend to hold you for the longest time.


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ART Info- SAM

FX Harsono - one of Indonesia's foremost contemporary artists - is the latest to be featured at the Singapore Art Museum (SAM).

Spanning four decades, Harsono's works speak of the changes and upheavals in Indonesian politics, society and culture.

A walk through Harsono's first exhibition in Singapore is like looking at a slice of Indonesian history and politics.

The 61-year-old fought as hard as his passion would take him, assembling the works in the face of fierce opposition from Indonesian authorities and scepticism from art critics.

"They said, 'this is not art, this is rubbish'. These young artists don't know about art and about our Indonesian tradition. But the young art critics said, 'yes, this is a new art'," said Harsono.

Every piece carries a powerful message.

"One thing we hope to achieve in exhibitions like this one is there is always a story behind contemporary art as well. So for Harsono's exhibition, it’s not just about his artistic practice but it's also the narrative of a nation that's behind it, and one man's journey behind it and how he has responded," explained Tan Siu Li, assistant curator at the Singapore Art Museum.

Harsono - who honed his skills in Yogyakarta and later at the Jakarta Institute - crafted politically-charged installations to express his unhappiness with the rule of former president Suharto in the 1990s.

As one wanders from one room to the next, you can see how shifts in political eras influenced the works of Harsono, especially following the resignation of former president Suharto in 1998.

This is when Harsono found the freedom he craved for - to take on a new artistic direction.

Installations of a more domestic setting and self-portraits reflect his shift away from the political to a more personal artistic expression.

Harsono also explores new audio and video mediums in his later works, adding to his vast repertoire of symbolic creations that span more than four decades of Indonesia's past.

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What a NIGHT!

Tossing and turning for the whole night. Urgh!

John's Drawing review tml, Tess's drawing review next Monday and review for my major next Wednesday... How wonderful is that?! On top of all the reviews, i've got to go take the learners knowledge course and test this weekend. Aint sure how i'll fare but hopefully, i don't fail! Art theory Essay and presentation are giving me headaches!

If i could, i would....((......))!

It must have been the bad night that cause me to be so so so grumpy today!



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Hey baby, when we are together
Doing things that we love
Every time you're near I feel like I'm in heaven
Feeling high
I don't want to let go, girl
I just need you to know, girl

I don't wanna run away
Baby, you're the one I need tonight
No promises
Baby, now I need to hold you tight
I just wanna die in your arms here tonight

Hey baby, when we are together
Doing things that we love
Every time you're near I feel like I'm in heaven
Feeling high
I don't want to let go, girl
I just need you to know, girl

I don't wanna run away
Baby, you're the one I need tonight
No promises
Baby, now I need to hold you tight
I just wanna die in your arms

I don't wanna run away
I want to stay forever through time and time
No promises

I don't wanna run away
I don't wanna be alone
No promises
Baby, now I need to hold you tight
Now and forever, my love
No promises

I don't wanna run away
Baby, you're the one I need tonight
No promises
Baby, now I need to hold you tight
I just wanna die in your arms here tonight

I don't wanna run away
Baby, you're the one I need tonight
No promises
Baby, now I need to hold you tight
I just wanna die in your arms here tonight


Time, of all things, Time. Im such a fool for you. Do you have to let it linger. Do you have to, do you have to, do you have to let it linger. Time will just erase all things and at the end of the day, we're nothing but the results of our own makings. Time. Everybody needs it. Time brings a closure to all things.



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Do not understand whats the reason behind it. Doesn't one have the basic courtesy of answering their phones? nor at least have the courtesy of returning missed calls explaining what had happened. However, it isn't happening and as time goes by, i cant really be bothered anymore, hence the stop of calling and text-ing.

Anyway, enough of the unpleasant stuffs. Days been filled with loads of work! Reviews coming up and its starting to stress me out. With visiting artists and different projects going on at the same time, leave me with no time to take a breather! Find myself running back to the studio on both weekends. Staying in school till late at night.

Phew~

I am glad, at least, i get a really good rest every night. It must have been the work loads. Practically fell into deep sleep the moment i lay myself on bed. Its good in a sense that i can forgo those nights where its hard to get to sleep- spending hours on bed tossing and turning! My eyes are shutting as im typing this post. So guys, im heading off to bed!

GOOD NIGHT and REST WELL, ALL ...


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Women need to say yes to sex



Whatever happened to wifely duty? Any thought that sex should still be included in the list of obligations that come with tying the knot is likely to be greeted with a hoot of derision by women today.

Wives willingly embrace far more tedious demonstrations of devotion like searching shopping centres for his favourite Y-fronts, to say nothing of bearing and raising his sprogs. But as for having a quick romp in the sack when they aren't quite in the mood that's beyond the pale.

These days unless women want sex it just doesn't happen. Women's right to say no has been enshrined in our cultural history since the 1960s when women's sexual rights became a rallying cry. As terrible stories of marital rape and sexual violence claimed the public's attention, women's right to refuse sex became fundamental to decent relations between the genders.

The new rule was that sex must wait until women are well and truly in the mood. But that was where we went wrong. The assumption that women need to want sex to enjoy it has proved a really damaging sexual idea, one that has wrought havoc in relationships for the past 40 years.

The problem is that in long-term relationships men are far more likely to retain their sexual drive than their partners. The No1 sexual problem plaguing women is low libido which means couples everywhere are struggling with a mismatch in desire. Women lie in bed worrying the hand will come creeping over. Men spend their lives grovelling for sexual favours. The gap between them in bed becomes a chasm.

This night-time drama is the source of great tension and unhappiness. Last year I recruited 98 ordinary couples to keep diaries recording their intimate negotiations over sex. The most powerful responses came from men, as their frustration pour out in a howl of disappointment and anger.

Many reported feeling duped, stunned that their needs are so totally ignored. But they rarely publicly voice these concerns. In the early 1960s, Betty Friedan wrote in The Feminine Mystique about ''the problem that has no name'' women's unvoiced frustrations with their housewifely role. Women live unexamined lives, she said and encouraged women to say, ''I want something more''. We have been saying it, very loudly, ever since. But now it is men who live unexamined lives, keeping their hidden yearnings to themselves. Their ''problem that has no name'' is sexual frustration.



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Work in Progress






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Work in progress





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Change of email add. summel1988@yahoo.com is no longer in use. Kindly forward all mails and notifications to summel1988@gmail.com

Thank you.








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Torn between you two........












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Well, we were having lunch and he went: darling I'll be going away for a few days for ceramic conference during the term break. And I look at him, nodded my head and say go ahead. Pause for a while and once again, he looked at me and I know he wants to say something else. So there I was, sitting in my seat, enjoying my seafood laksa and he said: darling I'll be going down to china with the rest in April, next year, for study trip ??? What? Did I miss out on something here? Well, he's been busy everyday, coming home late. Back in school on weekends. Other than bedtime, we're not together. I spend lots of time with Kenny instead of my partner. Dinner, movie, coffee or just be home relaxing. Though I spend lots of time with Kenny, it's not helping to ease the emptiness I'm feeling. I know clearly why i am feeling this way. It's not that Kenny isn't a good company to hang out with or whatsoever, it's just that he isn't the one whom is able to make me feel whole. It's YOU! I want your time. I need your concern. I hope to have your company. Once a week will be good enough. At least one full day.

I have been sitting here so long wasting time just staring at the phone. I was wondering should i call, then i thought- maybe you're not alone. So give me one more night. One more night, just one more night...For the longest time. If u say goodbye to me tonight there will still be music left to write. Once i thought my innocence was gone but i know happiness still goes on for the longest time. Maybe this wont last very long but you feel so right- but i could be wrong. Maybe i have been hoping too hard. Who knows how much further i can go on. Maybe I'll be sorry when you're gone. But i take my chances and i don't care what consequence it brings. I intend to hold you for the longest time... a long long time!

whoo~ oOoo.....

Cant seem to shake away this emptiness that I've been feeling all week. This void that's lingering just makes the whole week seem so dull. At least when I'm in my studio doing my work, it takes my mind away from all the unnecessary stuffs. Time time time time... YES, time is all i need, i suppose.



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MELBOURNE was AWESOME!

Met Mabelle, the crazy potter, spent the night at Julie Ayton's palace-like mansion. Whipped up a good spread of Asian food for all and families. Phillip Island, Penguin Parade and the Nobbies Center was absolutely wonderful. It brought much joy to Alvin and me by spending such a wonderful quality time with them. Met up with artists, went to the galleries as well as Victoria College of Arts. Walked in the city of Melbourne, having good yummy food is the highlights of the few days spent.

Life can be simple yet beautiful.

Things been alright, at least it did improve for both Alvin and me. However, we'll still bicker but i guess its just that way. Ain't no relationship that does not have any in it. Oh...another thing, Should you guys head to Melbourne, do stay in the Miami Hotel located in west Melbourne. Pretty near to City. Its Really really cheap. I booked the private ensuite room. The room has got all its basic necessity, including Shampoo, body was, conditioner, hand wash and shaving cream for men. The best part...definitely the TOILET! Its clean and huge. Full length mirror, white flooring and a platform shower area. All in glass door. It was so so beautiful. I can spent hours in the toilet :)


Got my results. It was....Alright but well, it definitely could be better. School starting in a week time. Hopefully everyone is in the midst of getting ready and pump up for the new semester. Most of them are graduating this year end and i do hope for the best for all. Im kind of ready to welcome the new semester and i hope its the same for you. May all be WELL, god bless!

Promised Alvin to accompany him to school for his orientation and after which to the gym but guess what.....

I was being Really lazy and didn't want to head to school with him therefore i told him I'll be sleeping in this morning but i will still head to the gym with him in the afternoon when he is done. At about 1pm, he called and i was still in bed.. Hahaha!! So i told him i guess i have to skip gym session today as im really really tired. hahahha! IM just PLAIN LAZY today, i know. Hopefully when he comes home, he wouldn't be too upset with me not keeping my promises... :D

I'll try my best to make it up to him. He's the KING today! :(


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What a week! There have been lots of small little arguments with him since the day he landed in Canberra. These few weeks i personally feel that its a time whereby we both come together again after months of separation and trying to get things back on track. Lots of different perspective, getting impatient with issues, frustrations. He ask if we should have our own space, meaning we both have our own rooms or whatsoever. The problem over here would be, why do we have to stay apart in Canberra when we're staying under the same roof in Singapore. He has his own views and opinions so do i. I seriously am not sure whats going to come out of this but it definitely ain't feeling good.Pretty much torn apart. I hope i wouldn't sink. Its been a difficult journey to start all over again, but i know it'll be fine after given some time to re-adjust the lifestyle. Its a totally brand new environment, a whole new journey and i am not sure whats gonna be like for the both of us. Im keeping my fingers crossed that the trip to Melbourne will do us good, put the differences behind us and try to be more tolerance with one another. I guess we both have to start all over again learning to accept the other party the way he/she is. Everyone's growing and learning, everyone's changing, but we just have to learn to adjust and accept whats in front of us.

Hopefully, all will be good and all the small little arguments will be gone soon.


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My partner finally arrived at Canberra 22:30pm. The flight must have tired him out. He's asleep soundly at this hour whereas i am still wide awake. He asked me whats on my mind but oh well, i guess there isn't much other than the fact that i woke up really late in the afternoon which resulted in me not being able to sleep. Been turning in at about 4am everyday and getting up at 2pm the next day seems to be the routine for the past week. Body clock is messed up i guess. Its time to fine tune it and hopefully get the body clock working well before the next semester begins.

Im yawning... Yawning yawning yawning
But i just cant get to sleep...
This is irritating me...
Been tossing and turning for hours before deciding to get out of bed and surf the net.

I hope the Sleeping bug come soon.....


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Hmm....

I got a new quilt cover yesterday and guess what? I cant believe i was so dumb to get the wrong size despite checking the tag. Now, i've got to make a trip down to city just to change it. For those who are back in Spore, enjoy the sunny island!
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Finally got everything done. Arrangement has been made for Alex to pick me up on Saturday to the gallery. Well, at this hour, im definitely not feeling too good. Really aint in the best of mood to be bothered about anything. Results will be out next week and hopefully all goes well. In my room, typing this post with music in the background just make the whole atmosphere seem so down, quiet, alone... While there are lots of peeps outside in the living room waiting to catch world cup doesnt really change the fact that im feeling lonely at this hour. Well, one could say: Turn off the lights and head straight to bed. But sometimes it isn't just that easy. Maybe its a habit, its a routine, whatever its name is called, i just love to lie in bed and think/ reminsce about old times. It isn't the best thing to do before sleeping because it just makes one much more awake than before.

Anyone out there actually have such moments whereby you type something and minutes later, you decide to delete away whatevers been written and you type the same thing over and over again just to find yourself deleting it again. Be it on laptops, notepad and of course, the mobile phone. Lots of mixed emotions? Better ways of phrasing the sentences? Afraid of....? or maybe just purely because there isn't much to say anymore but we just keep trying...? or maybe, we cant make up our mind? I turned on the television this morning and it was screening the Oprah talk show. It was talking about how things usually dosen't go as planned or how we would loved for it to be. But its the fact that we actually stand up and ACCEPT the fact that This is The Truth; The Reality instead of running away from it. No doubt that it was hard for me to absorb everything thats been said in the discussion since i just got up from sleep not too long ago but nonetheless, it did spoke to me. The very fact that one's willingness to accept "change" and welcome the "new" will somehow or rather determine one's path, maybe a change in perception but its definitely a brand new beginning.

And i am about to be on this journey.

Its going to take a long time to rework things out and i believe the journey after it will be a sweet and lasting one.


Goodnight all


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Finally, the mattress arrived.
Shelves bought. Quilt bought. Got a new bedsheet set, quilt set, new pillows!

All are almost done and ready for a brand new start

Well i hate to but still, got to give MR LEE Kay Choy, KENNY some credits for his kind help! Thank you!

Melboune. Cant wait for the trip. There are lots of galleries i would love to visit and hopefully able to engage with the gallery owner and who knows, opportunities may rise! *Fingers Croosed*

MAY ALL HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

Hugs (:


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oOoo. . . The house is packed!

Soccer, soccer soccer go go go!
Its getting fun in here
Its getting loud in here
Its getting warm in here, the heat is on! The match is on! The peeps are getting worked up as time goes by. . .Yelling, munching, drinking= good night!







Cheers,


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SNIP, SNIP, SNIP!

There goes my fringe (:
I snip it off myself and i actually think that it isnt that bad! Pretty SHORT fringe, it reminds me of younger days when i was pretty much a child. Mummy always place me in the toilet, cut a hole in the middle of the newspaper and put my head thru' the hole and start giving me a hair cut!

Just that she did a better job than me in trimming/ cutting my hair. :D

Anyway, theres been a lots of heated argument with him for the past few days which i do hope will be resolve soon since he's reaching this coming Thursday. Keeping my fingers crossed that everything will turn out fine. Have not been heading out, doing anything other than staying home and be a couch potato. Its getting unto me, getting sick of the daily routine. I am really bored though. . . Artworks for the exhibition are done and it leaves me with nothing on hand to do.

I wanna run
I wanna dance
I wanna play
I want ya here!


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Got up feeling a little heartache. But it'll just be another day to get by in life. I know it cant be help but things will turn out well, at least that's what i believe so.
1 week more to go and things will start all over again. A brand new start, a brand new journey. I do not know how things will turn out, but i hope, really praying hard, that things will go well. Im thinking of you at this time of the day K!


Will be having a group exhibition at a gallery next sat. Everythings alright and prints are set to go, so im keeping my fingers crossed that i'll be able to sell some of the prints if not, it'll still be good on the profile.

K, thats all for today. Cheers!!!



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When your purpose is not met, i dont see why do you still have to go ahead with doing things.

To me, you're bull shitting!

There is definitely no way im accepting this. Go ahead and do what you deem fit!





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Arrrrrrrr!

GOsh, SOmebody HELP me!!!

Spent hours doing up my Art theory "Discuss the role of gender, sexuality and the contruction of identity as part of the politics in art practise and/ or art historical interpretation in contemporary art.".... And when im finally done with it, guess what??

..................Its Studio Theory up next! Damm! Research, theory and Presentation for this course! SHucks, Seriously! Mike Parr, Mike Parr, Maike Parr, Mike Parr.....


What a way to spent my weekends eh?!

Aright a little update, it was Jay's birthday celebration last friday. Its was great, though it was just a small gatering. It turn out well. Food, chats, laughters as well as blessings were surronding the whole group for the whole night. All in all, i guess it was a good time catching up with the rest.

Im off to get my work done. Still a fair bit more to go.


:(


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im good.

maybe im not.

what do you want me to say.

sour. bitter. spicy and sweet. its all that i've experienced.

Feeling all so drain out with workload.

.........................................................................

Cant you find your own programme?

Cant you settle your own dinner?

Cant you find your own transport?

Cant you..........?

i have got loads of disappointment as well as unhappiness about this particular fellow. Alright, put it in simple words:

I do not wish to breath in the same air with him at the same time!

It erks me to face him, answer his questions. yea, maybe i might be petty whatever others might say, but still he just do not have the basic common sense. Nanny! Nanny! Nannny.................!

Grab a cab back and finally home at 02:00hrs.

Showered and feeling all so upset!

Lying on bed alone with music on, laptop as well as the television on.

Am going to turn in alone, a little not use to it. Getting all so use to having darling beside me- tugging me in, all the night whispering, nonsense and laughter before snoozing out.

Cant help but still feel so awake. So much wanted to call and have a chat k. But oh well, he might not have the time to talk anyway.








Shucks. . . .


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Just got home! was caught by surprise when given a white rose. But still, it was nice to have it.
everyone's asleep but not me. Am not at the least bit tired. Emotions still feeling sky high , an unforgetable day. Let it stay this way for just a while more alright.

Had my 1st reunion dinner yesterday! I find it amazing as to how my boyfriend is able to tahan with little sleep and mahjiong all night long since sat, and continue mahjong-ing with my cousin on sunday during the reunion dinner.

Hands Up***** Kowtow! (:


Darling had a very bad sprain starting from his neck to his shoulder blade area. Went for massage at Yishun yesterday night after all had ended [reunion dinner] and at least it soothes him out a little. Making a trip down to the doctor later on with him after dinner. Seeing him not having a good night rest for the past few days is terrible, and i cant do much- in fact, i cant do anything. Am not the doctor. Well, hopefully he'll be fine[ or much better] after seeing the doctor.



Am hungry! off to grab some food!!


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Oh God! I feel like a stalker. . . . . .

















Stalking you!


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Finally am up from my bed! Was out at Clarke quay yesterday. Had a good dinner and followed by a Whole night long of drinks as well as chats with a really close pal. Had wanted to switch a place and continue with our drinks and chat which afterwards, decide to abort the thinking and instead we both each grab a cab and head home to rest. 3am on my bed, kind of half awake was actually still thinking of a particular issue. But anyway, shant dwell too much in it K.

Woke up feeling neither here nor there.




Another 2weeks odd and we'll all be back in Canberra.


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It was a very last min decision to have this meet up. 5pm, her call came in and at 6.30pm we're sitting down at nafa's TCC all nice and good, having a cup of coffee as well as a good conversation. It was a good heart to heart chat. After all the chattings, went to look for alvin in his studio. After having a quite reasonable time of talking between the both of them, ah eng left. While walking her out of the school compound, i realise nafa days- really is a great time of making true friends, but oh well, she'll be leaving tml anyway, and will only be back on the 21st Feb which means i'll be gone~

Dearest Rene,
Apparently you'll be reading this entry. Gotta reject your meet up today because it was really last min [though nt as last min as ah eng] but still, i have got programmes scheduled for today. Like what you said, you're just trying your luck eh? But this time round, lady luck aint by your side you see... :) As spoken before, Next week, tues, thurs as well as fri i am available. So let me know of your schedule and we can work something out :)

Random pics of ah eng and mel







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After work, a good dinner at suntec, followed by a nice walk down the road. It was a beautifual night and good company.

Those days with him by my side. . .



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Meeting up with ***** later on this evening for dinner. [S"he"] isnt the sort of people you guys would want to mess with. I remember meeting her the first time when i was teaching at Newton Primary school where "she" was at that time taking classes there too. "She" is one who no doubt be nicknamed "Chao Bin Charbo". Her charcoal face together with the cold exterior makes one hard to approach her. She is not the one you want to spend another minute staying by her side. I remember her walking straight out of the class/art room after teaching, not for a moment to pause and smile, to try to strike up a conversation. "She" basically do not give a damm to anyone and just get her stuffs done and leave the school. Subsequent time of meeting her would be next at the school in Tampiness as well as woodland. Maybe i was itching for a stare, or a sacrastic remark from her but to my surprise she was actually quite ALRIGHT- at least to me. I do admire her sort of direct as well as frankness character. It just seem so natural and comfortable talking to her. "She" 35 this year? I remember she's just a year or two younger than Tianli. Oh well, i guess both tianli and ***** has got quite a similar attitude towards things, though they're complete strangers[which this is not my point], but they both have got strong characters. Till this day, I still find it surprising as to how we are able to talk and gradually become friends- [more than just the shallow type of friendship]. Meet up for coffee, Visiting Art Biennales, so on and so forth. Even when i am in Australia, those msn chats were fabulous and warm. "She" recently offered me a teaching project with schools but oh well, its a bad timing which i have to turn it down but seriously, i would love to take up the project and work together with her. It was quite an enjoyable time being a facilitator with her once at the Pasir ris sports centre and then a meal after a tiring day.

"She" has been hinting to me about her sexuality ever since we become closer- as in friends, talking term. But well, i dont deny i might have suspected it, but then again, so long as one day there isnt a confirmation, there still is a doubt isnt it? so i waited and waited silently till the day she is all ready and feeling all comfortable to tell me truthfully about her sexuality. I am glad and appreciative for her to take such a big step in coming forward to tell me things. Trust me, I have seen many of such cases whereby surronding people/friends are very sensative towards their own sexuality and find it hard to come forward and face it. Of course, its the worries of not being able to accept them for who they are, but thats society, thats what the enviroment/people are being mould into. I am dishearten to know that sometimes people do actually take advantage of them as well as denying them of their rights. And believe me, you guys out there, such people are actually much much more vulnerable than any of us! They do not open up easily, and when they do, they'll get hurt badly. "She" recently fallen for this girl and is having a hard time, however, it is not easy for the other party to accept her sexuality which is the root of the problem. True Friends doesn't mind what you are but who you truely is. And should they do, such friends aint worthy of your time and effort in keeping the friendship going.

Anyway, we have been chatting and i am apologetic to make her wait so long before meeting her ever since i was back. Apparently, i am having my first reunion dinner next sunday with my relative over at my place. After which on the eve, both alvin and i have got to run 2 places, one of which is his mum side as well as the other his dad side of relatives for reunion dinner. its very predictable and the same old routine for every chinese new year. But im not sick of it. Its a time for all of us to have a break, sit down together and talk "rubbish"? hahaah!!!! oh well, im looking forward towards the whole chinese new year thingy. :D


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Been browsing at the NAC grants and bursaries. It only deem fit to apply if only one is intending to exhibit his/her work. Overseas collaborative work sounds good to me. However, a proposed work have got to be submitted before the dateline. An interview will be arrange 3-4mnths down the road. After which, successful applicant would get the letter of offer. Amount would either be issued in one lump sum or in disbursement mode of quaterly payment.

At this point of time, i dont not think its an appropreiate timing for it. However, i would still love to give it a try, say probably mid 2010. I have plans going on in my head as to how to approach the next year in my arts journey, but not to deny, its still mushy, am goanna have to spend more time sitting on it and resolve issues and know clearly whats my take/ my route for the next year.

Every step my partner is taking towards achieving the goal of undertaking his master in arts/visual arts, a 2yrs course is getting nearer. Full sponsorship of his education is confirm. However, when he was socialing with one of the assessor from the panel over a mahjong game, he was told that this is really a bad time to do education esp in Australia. Should he do it in the states, it would very much be the same. And furthermore, the art scene in the states are much more flourished. But i am glad that his head of department is pushing really hard for this application and making it possible for him to undertake his mastersand of course, he knows that i am in Australia too, which makes up part of the reason as to why my partner chose to come to Australia instead of the states. I am glad that his head is very supportive and i can see my partner's effort to push all boundaries and making it all possible. To be frank, should it not because of me, i know he would very much love to go the the Univerisity of Alfred, New York.

Looking back at the times as to how we met, knew each other more and more as time goes by, falling deeply in love, breaking one anothers' heart, all these are things a couple go through in their love journey and it will come a stage whereby one another has become an important part of each others' life. Maybe its due to me having too much time on hand that i have been recently reflecting about this man who had been walking 3yrs (coming soon) of the journey with me and felt really heart warming and secure. I can almost feel as if he makes me whole which i dont think i can use any words to descibe such a feeling. And of course, I hve very much regretted saying hurtful words, doing things that breaks his heart, shutting him off, and thinking only all about what i want, how i feel, why is he......why cant he.... but never much more of what i can do for him, how i can go all the way out for him, be the one behind him who just give and support him silently. Had a huge row with him previous day which hurts really much but then again, after all these, the relationship strenghtens again, much deeper and more understanding as well as forgiving. I guess i will just have to take baby steps and do something about my attitude about things. Oh well, its really important to let the other partner knows how much you love him/her and just by saying just the simple 3 letter words to him/her every morning before he/she goes off to work really do make a different. Words of love is one key factor of love signs and i do very much appreciate him giving me the small little peck on my face every morning before he goes off for work, though im always half asleep still. But trust me, its really amazing, the moment you wakes up, the sweet feelings still lingers and the day will just be great.



Another word that is hard but everyone should learn would be contentment. Its always greener on the other side, no doubt about it. But do remember, the one who sleeps by your side every night, who wakes up facing you every morning, who goes through the roughest and toughest time in your life, who shares your joy and sorrow,who is able to make you laugh really hard and pains really badly, who commits and is responsible for you is the one who truely is goanna care and be there for you in time of trial.


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Internet is finally up!


Its going to be another few days of lazing and rotting at home before seeing all the naughty kids on weekend. Been running errands and doing household chores ever since i'ved moved in. I just cant understand why all these cleaning and buying of things doesnt seem to end. It almost seems like never ending chores!!!

My dog has been whining every single day since we've moved in. He wakes me up every morning with his barking too! But well, at least i have him to play with during the day which makes the time passes by fast. He loves going down to the park for "a"(actually many) walk(s) which i really dread doing so especially in the afternoon. Its so warm out there, but he just so love the sun! I've recently found many tiny red spots appearing especially on my arms which i was told that it was due to me being exposed to too much strong sunlight. It will first start out as very tiny red spot, and if one doesnt take care it will turn dark due to the increasing of age. . .

Anyway, Alvin been nagging me to take More care and to put in More effort in taking care of my skin! He never fails to come home every single night and ask me- [ Darling, Did you apply moisturiser today?]..[somehow along that line, its just that he phrases it differently though~] Apparently, it takes alot of effort, paitence, understanding as well as communication when two different sets of people come together and stay under one roof. Previously, we both do put up at one anothers place occasionally, however, this time round, he has been staying put with me ever since we shifted into the new flat. He recently was given a 20k YOG (youth olympic game) project which really eats up all his time. He's given all his time and energy to this project. He's home late and tired out every single day. He goes back to school even on weekends too. We'll we just had a unpleasent chat on bed before zoning out last night. I was grumbling and stuffs which, of course, i do know its my fault. However, most of the time, women just Love grumbling! There is no reason why, but we just love to do so! [ok, maybe because we have got too much time on hand] But all we want is not to make the other partner upset of fustrated but except that they would just shower a little bit more care and time unto us. I really do hope to get to spent much more quality time with my partner together outside of bedtime before heading back to canberra. Alright, my the other half would most prob be seeing this entry post which i really do hope he'll do so. But i dont deny you do put in effort to go for a walk down in the park with me, pick me up from work, have dinner with me. But all these things we've done together is not much that i can even used my 10fingers to count it. He was upset and said:[ Darling, why am i working so hard? Its for us! Dont you know] and of course, i do agree with him that we cant only survive on love and do not have bread, but oh well, its just...............me, myself and melinda. I'll just have got to be much much much more understanding. I dont need you to be home at a certain timing. i dont need you to spend every single day with me. All i want is ONE[1] day on the weekend to walk down the streets aimlessly talking about everything and anything under the sun, One day that belongs to me solely and nothing else, one day for you to be able to shower me with all your time and energy.

There is nothing wrong as to how we are now,but deep down, i do hope things might change a little- somehow? And dear all, dont get it wrong, both my partner and me are getting on fine, its just that i have all these small little grumbles and fustrations which i hope will go away soon.

Wow, looking back at this entry post, it seems like i've been going on ranting for quite a while. Am goanna stop here and go to bed! Rest well to you guys! Have a wonderful day ahead

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Fine tunning still. . .

It takes time. . .

























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